* The headline on page one of the sports section of a local daily read: “Lance Comes Clean on Doping.” As in the contemptible, arrogant Lance Armstrong publicly acknowledging what he has been lying about over the years. One problem: What’s with the first-name reference? We’re not talking about Madonna, Beyonce or Sting here. Are there too many letters in “Armstrong” to accommodate the space? Well then reconfigure it. Experience laying out a high school newspaper is all it takes.
Personally, I don’t like the implication that we, as readers, are on such first-name familiarity with the discredited likes of Lance Armstrong. I also prefer “Woods” to “Tiger” and “Hogan,” if not “Bollea,” to “Hulk.” But, no, it’s not as bad as, say, “Dolph Found Dead in Bunker,” but it’s bad enough.
* He’s baaack. That’s right, the post-governor, post-love-child-with-maid, post-relevant Arnold Schwarzenegger is back with another movie, The Last Stand. Which begs the obvious question: Why is there still a market for this shameless cartoon character’s movies?
* Al Pacino will play the late, died-in-disgrace Joe Paterno in the Brian De Palma-directed movie, Happy Valley. I’m already cringing.